150 Best Long Beach Sayings and Jokes You Wont Hear Anywhere Else

Ever heard someone say they’re “cruisin’ down PCH” or maybe “catching some rays at the Queen Mary”? Long Beach, California, has a unique vibe and a language all its own. This post dives into the hilarious world of Long Beach sayings and jokes, offering a peek at the city’s playful spirit.

Whether you’re a local or just visiting, understanding these inside jokes and common phrases will help you connect with the community. Get ready to laugh and learn some of the most iconic Long Beach sayings, you might even pick up a few to use yourself!

Best Long Beach Sayings and Jokes You Wont Hear Anywhere Else

• “I’m not saying Long Beach is flat, but you could play frisbee from downtown to Belmont Shore without breaking a sweat.”
• Why did the seagull get a parking ticket in Long Beach? Because it was illegally parked on a lifeguard stand.
• Long Beach: Where the fog rolls in like a celebrity on a red carpet, dramatically.
• A Long Beach native and a tourist are walking down Pine Ave. The tourist asks, “Is it always this lively?” The native replies, “Only on days ending in ‘y’.”
• My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes. So, I moved to Long Beach. (Just kidding, I love it here!)
• What’s a Long Beach resident’s favorite board game? ‘Monopoly,’ because they know the real estate values are just as crazy.
• Long Beach is so close to the water, you can hear the ocean whispering, “Parking’s a nightmare.”
• I tried to explain the traffic in Long Beach to someone from out of town. I just ended up making car noises and gesturing wildly.
• The Long Beach Aquarium is cool and all, but my bathtub has more interesting wildlife after a good rain.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike. I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid parallel parking.
• I’m convinced the seagulls in Long Beach have a secret society dedicated to stealing French fries.
• What do you call a Long Beach resident who’s lost their car keys? A walking tour guide.
• A man walks into a Long Beach coffee shop and asks for a latte with extra foam. The barista replies, “You mean, like the ocean after a storm?”
• Long Beach: Where ‘beach day’ can mean anything from sunbathing to dodging rogue waves and rogue scooters.
• “I’m not lost, I’m just taking the scenic route through Long Beach… which may or may not involve a wrong turn onto Ocean Blvd.”

Long Beach Local Lingo: Decoding the City’s Sayings

Ever wondered what a “Belmont Shore-thing” is? Or why everyone’s talking about “the Pike”? Long Beach has its own unique language, a blend of local spots and inside jokes. This guide to Long Beach lingo helps you decipher the city’s sayings, so you can laugh along with the locals and…

• Long Beach parking is like a game of hide-and-seek, except you’re always “it” and the parking spot is a master of disguise, and you should probably have a scooter.
• You know you’re a Long Beach local when you can navigate the traffic circle at 7th and Alamitos with your eyes closed and a coffee in hand, and then you realize you forgot your hat.
• “Just a quick bike ride” in Long Beach can turn into a full-day adventure that spans the entire bike path, and then you have to try to find parking for your bike, and then you realize you forgot your reusable water bottle.
• Long Beach weather: Where the fog rolls in like a celebrity on a red carpet, and then leaves without saying goodbye, and then you have to try to figure out how to get back to your car.
• “Let’s grab some tacos” in Long Beach is a statement of intent that will probably lead to a 3-hour tour of every taco shop within a 5-mile radius, and then you have to find parking.
• Long Beach dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good sunset view from the bluff, doesn’t mind a little sand in their shoes, and can parallel park on Ocean Boulevard without breaking a sweat, and also has a portable charger for when we are trying to find parking.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is by bike, but I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid parallel parking, and also, you should probably have a portable charger.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the seagulls are wearing sunglasses and are trying to steal your tacos, and also, they have a really good data plan.
• Long Beach: Where the question isn’t “What’s for dinner?” but “Which brewery are we hitting up tonight, and do they have a patio and validate parking for bikes?”
• “A few minutes away” in Long Beach means you’re either already there, or you’re still stuck in traffic on the 710, and then you realize you forgot your reusable water bottle, and then you have to try to find parking, and then you realize you forgot your hat.
• You know you’re a Long Beach local when you can give directions using only the names of different surf shops, the general direction of the Queen Mary, and the phrase “just past the place where the street art is really cool.”
• Long Beach is so flat, you could watch your phone battery die for three days, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car, and also, you should probably have a hat, and a backup plan for your bike.
• Long Beach: where the only thing more plentiful than the sunshine is the number of people trying to find parking near the beach, and also, the number of scooters that are trying to run you over.
• The most dangerous sport in Long Beach? Trying to parallel park on 2nd Street on a Saturday night, and then trying to find a place to lock your bike, and then trying to find a place to get a beer, and then realizing you forgot your portable charger.
• “I’m not lost, I’m just taking the scenic route through Long Beach…which may or may not involve a wrong turn onto Ocean Blvd, and then you realize you forgot your reusable water bottle, and then you try to find parking, and then you realize you forgot your hat, and then you have to start all over again tomorrow.”

Long Beach Comedy: Jokes That Only Locals Understand

Long Beach comedy is a special breed. It’s not just about the laughs, it’s about shared experiences. Jokes about the traffic on PCH, parking struggles downtown, or the unique charm of Belmont Shore – those are the kinds of bits that truly resonate. If you’re not from around here, you…

• Long Beach parking is like a game of musical chairs, except the music never stops, and you’re always the one without a seat.
• “Just a quick bike ride to the Queen Mary,” they said. Three hours later, I was still trying to find a place to lock my bike.
• You know you’re from Long Beach when you can distinguish between the different types of fog rolling in off the ocean.
• Long Beach dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good sunset from the bluff, doesn’t mind a little sand in their shoes, and can navigate a traffic circle without getting dizzy.
• I tried to have a peaceful moment at the beach, but a group of seagulls started a synchronized dance routine, and then they stole my sandwich.
• Long Beach weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden sea breeze, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a light jacket, and also, you should probably have a portable charger for when you are trying to find parking.
• “I’m not lost, I’m just taking the scenic route through Belmont Shore…which may or may not involve a detour to get some tacos and a coffee.”
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the palm trees are swaying in slow motion.
• My Long Beach apartment is so small, my surfboard has started asking for a rent reduction, and is demanding a better view of the ocean.
• You know you’re a Long Beach local when you can give directions using only the names of different surf shops, the general direction of the Aquarium, and the phrase “just past the place where the street art is really cool.”
• Long Beach is so flat, you could watch your phone battery die for three days, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car, and also, you should probably have a hat, and a backup plan for your bike, and maybe some sunscreen.
• I tried to have a picnic on the beach, but the sand said, “Hold my grains.”
• A Long Beach resident’s idea of “dressing up” is wearing a clean pair of flip-flops and a t-shirt that isn’t covered in sand.
• Long Beach traffic is a lot like the ocean, sometimes it’s smooth sailing, and sometimes you just get completely wiped out.
• Long Beach is where you can start your day with a surf session, have lunch at a food truck, and end the night with a craft beer, all while still wearing your flip-flops.

Long Beach Slang: Navigating the City’s Unique Vocabulary

Ever wondered what “the LBC” actually means? Long Beach has its own language, a mix of laid-back surfer vibes and urban cool. From “562” to “the pike,” understanding local slang is key to navigating the city. It’s all part of the charm, and the jokes here are often rooted in…

• Long Beach traffic is like the ocean; sometimes it’s smooth sailing, and sometimes you just get completely wiped out by a rogue wave of tourists.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike. I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid parallel parking, and then you have to find a place to lock it.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the palm trees are swaying in slow motion, and they are all trying to get a better view of the ocean.
• “I’m not lost, I’m just taking the scenic route through Long Beach… which may or may not involve a wrong turn onto Ocean Blvd, and then I’m probably going to stop for some tacos.”
• Long Beach drivers treat lane lines as suggestions, and speed limits as a personal challenge, and also, they all know where to get the best fish tacos, and also, they all have a portable charger.
• My Long Beach apartment is so small, my surfboard has started asking for a rent reduction, and also, it demands a better view of the ocean, and a really good data plan for when it’s trying to find a new surf spot.
• The Long Beach Aquarium is cool and all, but my bathtub has more interesting wildlife after a good rain, and also, I have to try to figure out how to find parking near the aquarium.
• The most dangerous sport in Long Beach? Trying to parallel park on 2nd Street on a Saturday night, and then trying to find a place to lock your bike, and then trying to find a place to charge your phone.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the pigeons are wearing sunglasses.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike. I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid the parking enforcement officers, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a really good data plan.
• Long Beach traffic is a lot like the ocean, sometimes it’s smooth sailing, and sometimes you just get completely wiped out. And also, you should probably have a portable charger.
• “A few minutes away” in Long Beach can mean anything from five minutes to an hour, depending on the traffic on Ocean, and if you have a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home, and also, if you have a portable charger.
• Long Beach weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden sea breeze, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a light jacket, and also, you should probably have a portable charger for when you are trying to find parking for your bike.
• Long Beach is so chill, even the seagulls have a “live and let live” attitude… except when it comes to unattended french fries.
• You know you’re a Long Beach local when you can distinguish between the different types of fog rolling in off the ocean, and you know where to find the best fish tacos, and you know where to find a parking spot that isn’t going to get you a ticket, and also, you have a portable charger, and a really good data plan.

Long Beach Puns: Wordplay and Wit from the Coast

Dive into ‘Long Beach Puns,’ a hilarious collection showcasing the city’s playful side. It’s a treasure trove of wordplay, adding a uniquely local flavor to the wider ‘Long Beach Sayings and Jokes’ scene. From beachy puns to harbor humor, this book will have you laughing with the tide, proving Long…

• Long Beach: Where the fog is just a low-flying cloud with a really good data plan.
• You know you’re a Long Beach local when you can identify the exact type of taco truck by the length of the line, and then you have to try to find parking.
• My Long Beach apartment is so close to the ocean, my shower has started to develop a tide schedule.
• Long Beach: Where the speed limit is just a suggestion and the bike lanes are a battleground.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike, but I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid a parking ticket, and then you have to figure out how to lock it up.
• Long Beach dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good sunset, doesn’t mind a little sand, and can parallel park on Ocean Boulevard without breaking a sweat, and also has a portable charger, and a good data plan for when we are trying to find a new taco spot.
• “I’m not lost, I’m just taking the scenic route through Long Beach…which may or may not involve a wrong turn onto Ocean Blvd, and then you realize you forgot your reusable water bottle.”
• Long Beach weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden urge for a fish taco, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a light jacket, and a portable charger for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the seagulls are trying to find a place to charge their phones.
• My favorite Long Beach workout? Trying to find a parking spot near the Pike on a Saturday night, and then trying to find a place to lock my bike, and then trying to find a place to get a beer, and then trying to figure out how to get back home, and then I have to start all over again tomorrow, and then I realize I forgot my hat, and then I have to try to find parking again, but it’s going to be worth it, and then I realize I forgot my portable charger.
• Long Beach: Where “a few minutes away” can mean anything from five minutes to an hour, depending on the traffic on the 710, if the taco truck you are going to is open, and if you have a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you get lost trying to figure out how to get back to your car.
• Long Beach traffic is like a choose-your-own-adventure book, but all the endings involve a detour and a scooter rider going the wrong way in a bike lane, and then you realize you forgot your reusable water bottle.
• You know you’re a Long Beach local when you can distinguish between the different types of fog rolling in off the ocean, and also, you know where to find the best fish tacos, and also, you have a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the palm trees are swaying in slow motion, and they are probably trying to get a better view of the ocean, and also, they are all trying to get a good data signal.
• Long Beach: Where the question isn’t “What’s for dinner?” but “Which taco truck are we hitting up tonight, and do they have a place to lock our bikes, and do they have a portable charger?”

Long Beach Specific Humor: Finding the Funny in Everyday Life

Long Beach humor? It’s a vibe. We laugh at the parking struggles, the endless traffic on PCH, and maybe even the occasional seagull stealing our fries. It’s about finding the funny in our shared Long Beach experiences. These sayings and jokes are our way of connecting, a local language spoken…

• Long Beach: Where the fog rolls in like a confused tourist with a map, then leaves without saying goodbye.
• My Long Beach apartment is so close to the ocean, my shower has started to develop a tide schedule, and my neighbor’s surfboard is now my roommate.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike, I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid parallel parking, and maybe get a tan.
• Long Beach traffic is like a choose-your-own-adventure book, but all the options lead to a detour on PCH and a strong urge for tacos.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the palm trees are swaying in slow motion, and they are probably trying to get a better view of the ocean, and also, they are all trying to get a good data signal.
• “Just a quick trip to Belmont Shore,” said the Long Beach resident, three hours before returning home with a sunburn, sand in their shoes, and a new appreciation for the local taco truck.
• You know you’re in Long Beach when you can hear the foghorns, the seagulls, and someone complaining about the parking, all at the same time, and then someone starts a drum circle, and then you realize you forgot your portable charger.
• My Long Beach dating profile picture is just me holding a fish taco, because honestly, what else is there?
• Long Beach parking is like a mythical creature; you hear stories about it, but you rarely ever see it, and if you do, it’s probably about to get a ticket.
• Long Beach is so flat, you could watch your phone battery die for three days, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car, and also, you should probably have a hat, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike.
• Long Beach drivers treat lane lines as suggestions and speed limits as a personal challenge, especially when they are trying to get to the beach, and also, they all have a really good data plan.
• Long Beach: Where the speed limit is just a suggestion and the bike lanes are a battleground, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and also, you should probably just get some tacos.
• “I’m not lost, I’m just taking the scenic route through Long Beach… which may or may not involve a wrong turn onto Ocean Blvd, and a spontaneous stop for some tacos, and then I will probably be late.”
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike. I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid parallel parking, and then you have to figure out how to lock it up, and then you realize you forgot your reusable water bottle.
• Long Beach traffic is like the ocean, sometimes it’s smooth sailing, and sometimes you just get completely wiped out.

Long Beach Nicknames and Terms: Insider Language of the Community

Long Beach isn’t just a place, it’s a vibe, and we’ve got the language to prove it! From “The LBC” to “Zaferia” and friendly jabs about “The Pike,” local nicknames and terms are a secret handshake. It’s our shared slang, woven into everyday jokes, that makes being a Long Beacher…

• My Long Beach apartment is so close to the ocean, my pet hermit crab started paying rent in sea shells.
• You know you’re from Long Beach when your GPS just says, “Prepare for a detour due to a sudden urge for tacos.”
• A Long Beach resident’s idea of a balanced diet is a fish taco in one hand, a craft beer in the other, and a side of ocean breeze.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike. I’ve found it’s also the best way to get a good tan, and then try to find parking.
• “Just a few minutes away” in Long Beach time is a flexible concept, usually involving a detour to get some coffee, and then you have to find a place to lock your bike.
• Long Beach traffic is like a slow-motion dance-off between cars and scooters, and you’re just trying to get to the beach.
• They say the fog in Long Beach is a mystery, I think it’s just a really long-term visitor from San Francisco.
• Long Beach: Where the speed limit is just a suggestion and the bike lanes are a battleground, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home.
• I tried to have a quiet moment at the beach, but a group of seagulls started a synchronized dance routine and then they asked me for fries.
• My Long Beach apartment is so small, my surfboard has started complaining about the lack of space, and also, it’s demanding a better view of the ocean, and also, it wants a really good data plan for when it is trying to find a new surf spot.
• You know you’re a true Long Beach local when you can give directions using only the names of different surf shops, the general direction of the Aquarium, and the phrase “just past that place with the really cool street art.”
• My Long Beach dating profile picture is just me holding a fish taco and a craft beer, because honestly, what else is there?
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the palm trees are swaying in slow motion, and then they are all trying to get a better data signal.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike. I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid parallel parking, and then you should probably have a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home, and also, you should probably just get some tacos.
• My Long Beach workout routine is simple: running to catch the bus, only to find out it’s delayed, and then I just get a coffee, and then I try to find parking for my bike, and then I just walk.

Long Beach Cultural Sayings: Expressions Rooted in Local Heritage

Long Beach isn’t just about sun and surf; it has its own language! “Long Beach Cultural Sayings” explores phrases born from our unique history and neighborhoods. These aren’t just jokes, they’re expressions reflecting our community’s spirit. Dive into local slang, and you’ll uncover more than laughs – you’ll find the…

• Long Beach: Where the ocean is your therapist, and the parking is your anxiety.
• “I’m not lost, I’m just exploring the scenic route to the taco truck…which may or may not involve a detour through a bike lane.”
• You know you’re in Long Beach when you can tell the time by the foghorn schedule, and also, the line at your favorite coffee shop.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, the speed limit is more of a suggestion, and the traffic is just a slow-moving beach parade.
• My Long Beach dating profile? Seeking someone who appreciates a good sunset, doesn’t mind a little sand, and can parallel park on Ocean Boulevard without breaking a sweat, and also has a portable charger for when I’m trying to find parking near the aquarium.
• Long Beach: Where the only thing more plentiful than the sunshine is the number of people trying to find parking near the beach, and then trying to find a place to lock their bikes.
• “Hon, that’s about as likely as finding a parking spot near the Queen Mary on a Saturday, and also, you should probably just take a scooter, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you get lost trying to figure out how to get back to your car.”
• My Long Beach workout? Dodging scooters on the boardwalk while carrying a surfboard and a reusable water bottle, and then trying to find parking.
• “The best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike,” they said, “it’s also the best way to avoid parallel parking,” I replied, “and then you have to figure out where to lock your bike, and then you realize you forgot your hat, and then you decide to just go home.”
• Long Beach: Where the fog is a daily reminder that even the most beautiful things can be a little bit mysterious, and also, you should probably have a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car.
• Long Beach is so flat, you could watch your phone battery die for three days, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car.
• “My Long Beach apartment is so small, my surfboard has started asking for a rent reduction, and is demanding a better view of the ocean.”
• “You know you’re in Long Beach when your GPS just says, ‘Prepare for a detour due to a sudden urge for tacos, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home’.”
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the palm trees are swaying in slow motion and trying to get a better data signal.
• Long Beach weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden urge for a fish taco, and the distinct possibility of needing both a t-shirt and a light jacket, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a good data plan.

Long Beach Joke History: Tracing the Evolution of City Humor

Long Beach’s humor scene is a quirky tapestry. From old-timey jabs about the Pike to modern riffs on beach life, the city’s jokes have evolved. “Long Beach Sayings and Jokes” explores this journey, revealing how local slang and shared experiences have shaped a unique comedic identity. It’s a fun dive…

• My Long Beach apartment is so close to the ocean, my pet hermit crab is starting to develop a complex about the lack of space, and is demanding a better view of the beach, and a portable charger for when it is trying to figure out how to get back to its shell.
• Long Beach: Where the question isn’t “What’s for dinner?” but “Which taco truck are we hitting up tonight, and do they have a place to lock our bikes, and do they have a portable charger?”
• A Long Beach resident’s idea of a “quick dip” is a three-hour ocean excursion with a surfboard and a cooler full of snacks, and then they have to try to find parking.
• Long Beach traffic is like a slow-motion dance-off between cars and scooters, and you’re just trying to get to the beach, and also, you should probably have a good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car.
• Long Beach dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good sunset, doesn’t mind a little sand, and can parallel park on Ocean Boulevard without breaking a sweat, and also has a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when we are trying to find a new place to get a fish taco.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike, I’ve found it’s also the best way to get a good tan, and then try to find parking, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home.
• Long Beach is so laid-back, even the seagulls are trying to find a place to charge their phones, and also, they are probably trying to steal your tacos.
• My Long Beach car alarm is just a recording of a foghorn and someone yelling “Where’s my parking spot, and can I borrow a charger?”, and then a seagull squawking.
• My Long Beach workout routine is simple: running to catch the bus, only to find out it’s delayed, and then I just get a coffee, and then I try to find parking for my bike, and then I just walk, and then I start all over again tomorrow, but at least I got a good view of the ocean.
• Long Beach is where you can start your day with a surf session, have lunch at a food truck, and end the night with a craft beer, all while still wearing your flip-flops, and also, you should probably have a portable charger.
• My Long Beach apartment is so close to the ocean, my shower has started to develop a tide schedule, and also, my surfboard is now my roommate, and it’s starting to complain about the lack of space.
• Long Beach is so flat, you could watch your phone battery die for three days, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back to your car, and also, you should probably have a hat, and a backup plan for your bike, and also, you should probably just get some tacos.
• A Long Beach resident’s idea of a “quick trip” is a leisurely bike ride to three different surf shops, just to compare the board shorts, and then they try to find parking, and then they realize they forgot their hat, and then they start all over again tomorrow, but it is going to be worth it.
• They say the best way to explore Long Beach is on a bike. I’ve found it’s also the best way to avoid parking enforcement officers.
• Long Beach: Where the speed limit is just a suggestion and the bike lanes are a battleground, and also, you should probably have a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home.