150 Best Milwaukee Sayings and Jokes You Gotta Hear to Believe

Ever heard someone say “bubbler” and wondered what they meant? Or maybe you’ve been on the receiving end of a good-natured “you betcha!” Welcome to the world of Milwaukee, where unique phrases and humor are as common as cheese curds. Get ready to dive into a collection of Milwaukee sayings and jokes that’ll have you saying “yah, hey!” in no time.

This post explores the local lingo and playful banter that make Milwaukee, well, Milwaukee. From endearing terms to classic one-liners, we’ll uncover the heart and humor behind these iconic expressions. Prepare to laugh and learn a little Milwaukeean while we’re at it!

Best Milwaukee Sayings and Jokes You Gotta Hear to Believe

• “You know you’re from Milwaukee when you consider a Friday fish fry a dietary requirement.”
• Why did the bratwurst cross the road? To get to the other side…of the stadium, where the beer was colder.
• A Milwaukeean’s definition of ‘light’ traffic is when there are only three cars ahead of you at the on-ramp.
• “I’m not saying Milwaukee winters are long, but my car started speaking German in February.”
• What’s a Milwaukeean’s favorite type of music? Polka… played loudly at a summer festival.
• “The Brewers’ losing streak is so bad, even the sausage races are starting to look depressed.”
• A Milwaukee tourist asked, “Where’s the best place for a cheese curd?” The local replied, “Which gas station are you closest to?”
• You can tell a Milwaukeean is stressed when they order a double Old Fashioned, and *still* tip 20%.
• “Milwaukee weather forecast: Expect a chance of sunshine, followed by a 90% chance of someone complaining it’s too hot or too cold.”
• My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes, so I ordered a second plate of cheese fries. I guess I’m living my best Milwaukee life.
• A Wisconsinite walks into a bar in Milwaukee and orders a drink. The bartender says, “That’ll be $7.” The Wisconsinite replies, “Are you sure it’s not $6 and a story?”
• The Milwaukee Art Museum is so modern, it makes my grandma think she’s stepped into a spaceship piloted by cheeseheads.
• “I tried to explain to someone outside of Milwaukee what a ‘bubbler’ was. They looked at me like I was trying to sell them a used water cooler.”
• Two Milwaukeeans are arguing about which is better, Sprecher or Lakefront. The debate is still raging, and may never end.
• “If you’re ever lost in Milwaukee, just follow the smell of grilling brats. You’ll find your way home, or at least a great party.”

Milwaukee Sayings: Decoding the Local Lingo

Ever wondered what a “bubbler” or a “brat” really means? Dive into “Milwaukee Sayings: Decoding the Local Lingo” to understand the quirky dialect of Brew City. It’s more than just words; it’s a glimpse into Milwaukee’s unique culture, found within the broader collection of “Milwaukee Sayings and Jokes”. Get ready…

• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can navigate the city using only the names of breweries, the general direction of Lake Michigan, and the phrase, “just past that statue of the Fonz, and then you should probably check if your car is still there.”
• Milwaukee weather is like a surprise party you didn’t ask for; expect sunshine, a sudden downpour, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a winter coat, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a portable charger.
• I tried to order a small beer in Milwaukee, they handed me a stein the size of my head and a foam hat.
• My Milwaukee GPS now just says, “Prepare for a detour due to road construction and a strong desire for a bratwurst, and also, you should probably check if you have a parking ticket from last night, and then you should probably find a place to charge your phone.”
• “Just a few minutes away” in Milwaukee means you’re either already there, or you’re still in the next county, and it’s probably because you stopped for a cheese curd.
• My Milwaukee apartment is so small, my houseplants are starting to complain about the lack of natural light, and also, they are asking for a subscription to a local brewery, and also, they are asking for a portable charger.
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a “light snack” is a bratwurst, a cheese curd, and a pretzel, with a side of beer cheese, and then they try to find parking.
• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can identify the exact type of cheese curd just by the squeak.
• Milwaukee dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good beer, doesn’t mind a little bit of snow, and can navigate the city without a map, and also has a really good data plan for when we are trying to find parking, and a backup plan for their bike, and knows where to find the best Friday fish fry.
• “My favorite Milwaukee workout? Trying to find a parking spot near the lakefront during a festival, and then trying to find a place to sit, and then trying to find a place to get a beer, and then trying to find my way back to my car, and then I have to start all over again tomorrow, and then I have to try to find a new place to lock my bike.”
• Milwaukee traffic is like a cheese curd, it’s a little bumpy, a little squeaky, and it’s always going to get you where you need to go, eventually, but first you have to find parking.
• “Milwaukee time” is a flexible concept, usually ranging from “I’m leaving now” to “I’ll be there when I get there, and I’m probably going to stop for a beer on the way, and also, I should probably have a backup plan for my bike.”
• You know you’re in Milwaukee when the question isn’t “What’s for dinner?” but “Which brewery are we hitting up tonight, and do they have a patio, and do they validate parking, and do they have a portable charger?”
• “You know you’re in Milwaukee when you can identify the exact type of beer just by the smell, and you know where to find parking near the lakefront, and you know where to find a good Friday fish fry, and you know how to pronounce ‘Paczki’, and you have a portable charger.”
• Milwaukee: where the beer is always cold, the cheese curds are always fresh, and the parking is always a challenge, and you should probably have a backup plan for your bike.

Milwaukee Jokes: A Brew of Humor

“Milwaukee Jokes: A Brew of Humor” dives deep into the city’s unique comedic landscape. It’s not just about beer and brats; it’s about the shared experiences, quirks, and local lingo that make Milwaukee, well, Milwaukee. This collection captures the heart of our city’s wit, offering a taste of what makes…

• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can give directions using only the names of breweries, the general direction of Lake Michigan, and the phrase, “just past the statue of the Fonz and the place that has the best cheese curds.”
• My favorite Milwaukee workout? Trying to parallel park on Brady Street on a Friday night, and then trying to find a place to sit, and then trying to find a place to get a beer, and then trying to find my way back to my car, and then I have to start all over again tomorrow.
• I tried to order a small beer in Milwaukee, they handed me a stein the size of my head and said, “Is this for the baby?”
• Milwaukee weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden downpour, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a winter coat, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to find parking near a festival.
• “Just a few minutes away” in Milwaukee means you’re either already there or you’re still in the next county, and it’s probably because you stopped for a cheese curd.
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a “light snack” is a bratwurst, a pretzel, a cheese curd, and a beer.
• My Milwaukee apartment is so small, my beer fridge is starting to develop a complex, and it’s asking for a bigger tap system.
• I tried to have a moment of peace by Lake Michigan, but a group of people started a debate about the best brewery in the area, and then they asked if I wanted to join them, and then I did, and then we all spent the rest of the day trying to find parking, and then we realized we had no idea how to get back home.
• Milwaukee drivers use turn signals like they are a suggestion, and the speed limits are just a guideline, and also, they all have a really good knowledge of all the best places to get a bratwurst, and they all have a backup plan for their bike.
• Milwaukee dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good beer, doesn’t mind a little bit of snow, and can navigate the city without a map, and also has a really good data plan for when we are trying to find parking near the lakefront, and a portable charger, and a really good knowledge of all the best places to get a cheese curd.
• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can pronounce “Oconomowoc” without breaking a sweat, and you know the best place to get a fish fry, and you know which brewery has the best summer seasonal, and you know where to find parking near the lakefront, and you also know how to pronounce “Paczki”.
• “I’m not saying the portions are big, but my plate of cheese curds came with its own zip code.”
• “My favorite Milwaukee workout? Trying to find a parking spot near the lakefront during a festival, and then trying to find a place to sit, and then trying to find a place to get a beer, and then trying to find my way back to my car, and then I have to start all over again tomorrow, and then I have to try to find a new place to lock my bike, and then I realize I forgot my hat, and then I have to start all over again tomorrow.”
• Milwaukee weather is like a surprise party you didn’t ask for; expect sunshine, a sudden downpour, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a winter coat, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home.
• A Milwaukee tourist asked, “Where’s the best place for a cheese curd?” The local replied, “Which gas station are you closest to?”

Unique Milwaukee Sayings: Expressions of the City

Milwaukee’s got its own language, ya know? Beyond the usual “bubbler” and “brat,” we’ve got sayings that’ll make you chuckle and scratch your head. From “Don’t be a yooper” to “that’s by me,” these expressions are pure Milwaukee, a blend of humor and local flavor. They’re part of the city’s…

• “A Milwaukee minute” is roughly equivalent to the time it takes to finish a brat and find a parking spot near the lakefront.
• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can identify the exact brewery just by the smell of the hops in the air, and also, you know where to find a parking spot that isn’t going to get you a ticket, and also, you know how to pronounce “Oconomowoc” without breaking a sweat.
• Milwaukee’s weather forecast: Expect a 50% chance of sunshine, a 50% chance of snow, and 100% chance of someone saying, “Ya know, it could be worse.”
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a balanced diet is a Friday fish fry, a Saturday brat, and a Sunday cheese curd, and you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a really good data plan, and a portable charger for when you are trying to find parking, and also, you should probably have a good sense of humor about the traffic.
• My GPS in Milwaukee now just says, “Prepare for a detour due to road construction, and a strong urge for a bratwurst, and also, you might want to check if you have a parking ticket from last night, and also, you should probably have a portable charger.”
• “Just a few blocks over” in Milwaukee means you’re either already there, or you’re still in the next county, and you probably stopped to get some cheese curds.
• Milwaukee traffic is like a cheese curd; it’s a little bumpy, a little squeaky, and it’s always going to get you where you need to go, eventually, but first you have to find a parking spot.
• Milwaukee dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good beer, doesn’t mind a little bit of snow, and can navigate the city without a map, and also has a really good data plan for when we are trying to find parking near the lakefront, and a portable charger, and a really good knowledge of all the best places to get a cheese curd, and they also know how to pronounce “Paczki.”
• Milwaukee: where “a quick trip” to the store involves stopping at three different breweries and a farmers market, and then you realize you forgot your reusable shopping bags, and then you have to figure out how to lock your bike, and then you have to start all over again tomorrow.
• You know you’re in Milwaukee when a conversation about the weather includes a detailed discussion on the humidity, the pollen count, and whether or not it’s a good day for a brewery tour, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike.
• Milwaukeeans don’t have “accents,” they have “vocal enthusiasm,” and they always end a sentence with a friendly “Ya know?”
• My Milwaukee apartment is so small, my beer fridge is starting to develop a complex, and it’s demanding a bigger tap system, and also, it wants to have a view of the lake.
• The Milwaukee Art Museum is so modern, it makes my grandma think she’s stepped into a spaceship piloted by cheeseheads, and also, she is probably trying to find a place to charge her phone, and also, she is probably trying to figure out how to lock up her bike, and also, she is probably trying to find parking.
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a “light snack” is a bratwurst, a cheese curd, and a pretzel, with a side of beer cheese, and also, they are trying to find a parking spot that isn’t going to get them a ticket.
• Milwaukee dating is like a brewery tour: lots of options, a little bit hazy, and you’re never quite sure if you’ll find “the one” or just someone who wants to share your cheese curds.

Milwaukee Jokes About Beer: A Hoppy Laugh

Milwaukee’s love for beer is legendary, and so are its jokes about it! “Milwaukee Jokes About Beer: A Hoppy Laugh” captures the city’s playful relationship with its favorite beverage. From witty one-liners to relatable anecdotes, this collection perfectly embodies the humor found in everyday Milwaukee life, reflecting a culture that…

• My blood type is Miller Lite positive with a hint of cheese curd.
• Milwaukee: Where “one more” is a unit of time, not a quantity of beer.
• I’m not saying the beer is good, but I saw a Packers fan buy a round for a Bears fan.
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a balanced diet is a brat in one hand and a beer in the other, and maybe a cheese curd somewhere in the mix.
• They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy a six-pack in Milwaukee, which is pretty close.
• My favorite Milwaukee workout is lifting a heavy stein to my mouth, repeatedly.
• You know you’re in Milwaukee when the bartender asks if you want a “chaser” and hands you another beer.
• Milwaukee: Where “craft beer” is not a trend, it’s a way of life, and also, a way to avoid doing yard work.
• I tried to order a light beer in Milwaukee, they looked at me like I’d asked for a decaf coffee.
• In Milwaukee, “a couple” of beers is a very subjective term, and it probably means that I will need to call an Uber.
• Milwaukee’s version of a wine tasting? A brewery tour, and you should probably have a backup plan for your bike.
• My therapist told me to embrace my inner Milwaukeean, so I drank a lot of beer and complained about the weather, and then tried to find parking.
• They say the best things in life are free, but in Milwaukee, the best things come in a frosty mug, and you should probably have a portable charger.
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a “quick trip” is a drive to three different breweries, just to compare the IPAs, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike.
• Milwaukee: Where the only thing more abundant than beer is the number of opinions on which brewery is the best, and they all have a really good data plan for when they are trying to figure out how to get back home.

Regional Milwaukee Sayings: From the East Side to the Bay View

Milwaukee’s got its own language, ya know? Beyond general Wisconsinisms, each neighborhood adds its flavor. “The East Side” might use a phrase differently than someone in Bay View. It’s like a secret code, a mix of funny, familiar, and totally Milwaukee. Discovering these regional sayings is half the fun of…

• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can navigate the city using only the names of breweries, the general direction of Lake Michigan, and the phrase, “just past that statue of the Fonz and the place that has the best cheese curds, and then you might have to try to find parking for your bike”.
• My Milwaukee therapist told me to embrace my inner cheesehead, so I started wearing a foam cheese wedge to therapy and talking about the latest brewery openings, and then asked if they wanted to go for a bike ride along the lakefront, and then we did, but first we had to find parking, and then we had to try a new brewery, and then we started to argue about which brewery was better.
• Milwaukee dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good beer, doesn’t mind a little bit of snow, and can navigate the city without a map, and also has a really good data plan for when we are trying to find parking near the lakefront, and a portable charger, and a really good knowledge of all the best places to get a cheese curd, and they can pronounce “Paczki” correctly.
• “Just a few minutes away” in Milwaukee can mean anything from five minutes to an hour, depending on if there’s a festival going on, if the brewery you are going to is open, if you can find parking, and if you have a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home, and also, if you have a portable charger.
• Milwaukee weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden downpour, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a winter coat, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to find parking near a festival, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your car.
• You know you’re from Milwaukee when you consider a Friday fish fry a dietary requirement, and then you complain about the traffic on the way to the restaurant, and then you try to find a parking spot, and then you realize you forgot your hat, and then you have to go back home, and then you have to start all over again tomorrow.
• My Milwaukee apartment is so small, my beer fridge is starting to develop a complex, and it’s demanding a bigger tap system, and also, it wants to have a view of the lake, and a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when it is trying to figure out how to get back home.
• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can pronounce “Oconomowoc” without breaking a sweat, and you know the best place to get a fish fry, and you know which brewery has the best summer seasonal, and you know where to find parking near the lakefront, and you also know how to pronounce “Paczki”, and you have a portable charger.
• Milwaukee: Where “one more” is a unit of time, not a quantity of beer, and also, it means you’ll probably have to try to find parking again, and you probably forgot your hat, and you probably need to charge your phone.
• You know you’re in Milwaukee when the question isn’t “What’s for dinner?” but “Which brewery are we hitting up tonight, and do they have a patio, and do they validate parking for bikes, and do they have a portable charger?”
• Milwaukee drivers use turn signals like they are a suggestion, and the speed limits are just a guideline, and also, they all have a really good knowledge of all the best places to get a bratwurst, and they all have a backup plan for their bike.
• “Milwaukee time” is a flexible concept, usually ranging from “I’m leaving now” to “I’ll be there when I get there, and I’m probably going to stop for a beer on the way, and also, I should probably have a backup plan for my bike, and a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when I get lost trying to figure out how to get back home.”
• They say the best things in life are free, and in Milwaukee, that includes the view of Lake Michigan, and the sound of the gulls, and the feeling of being a cheesehead, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike.
• My favorite Milwaukee workout? Trying to find a parking spot near the lakefront during a festival, and then trying to find a place to sit, and then trying to find a place to get a beer, and then trying to find my way back to my car, and then I have to start all over again tomorrow, and then I have to try to find a new place to lock my bike, and then I realize I forgot my hat, and then I have to start all over again tomorrow, and then I realize I forgot my phone charger.
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a “light snack” is a bratwurst, a cheese curd, and a pretzel, with a side of beer cheese, and then they try to find parking, and then they realize they forgot their hat, and then they start all over again tomorrow.

Milwaukee Jokes and Their Origins: Uncovering the Funny

Ever wondered why Milwaukee gets a laugh? “Milwaukee Sayings and Jokes” delves into the city’s unique humor, exploring the origins of its self-deprecating jokes. From beer-soaked stereotypes to the love of Friday fish fry, we uncover the funny behind the familiar, revealing how local culture shapes the punchlines.

• “A Milwaukeean’s idea of a ‘quick trip’ is a drive to three different breweries, just to compare the IPAs, and then a stop at a custard stand, and then they try to find parking, and then they have to figure out how to get home, and then they start all over again tomorrow.”
• My Milwaukee apartment is so small, my beer fridge is starting to develop a complex, and it’s demanding a bigger tap system, and also, it wants a view of Lake Michigan, and a portable charger for when it’s trying to find parking near a festival.
• Milwaukee drivers use their turn signals like they’re optional features on a luxury car, and speed limits like a suggestion from a tourist, and also, they all know where to find the best Friday fish fry, and they all have a backup plan for their bike.
• They say the best things in life are free, but in Milwaukee, the best things come in a frosty mug, and you should probably have a portable charger.
• “Just a few blocks over” in Milwaukee means you’re either already there, or you’re still in the next county, and it’s probably because you stopped for a cheese curd, and then you decided to try a new brewery, and then you had to figure out how to get back home, and then you started all over again tomorrow, but it was still going to be worth it.
• Milwaukee weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden downpour, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a winter coat, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a portable charger, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to find parking near a festival, and also, you should probably have a good sense of humor.
• A Milwaukeean’s idea of a “light snack” is a bratwurst, a pretzel, a cheese curd, and a beer, and then they try to figure out how to get their bike back home.
• “One more” in Milwaukee is a unit of time, not a quantity of beer, and also, it means that you are probably going to have to try to find parking again.
• A Milwaukee love story: I knew they were the one when they could pronounce “Oconomowoc” without breaking a sweat, and knew the best place to get a Friday fish fry, and they knew where to find a parking spot downtown during a festival, and they had a portable charger for their phone.
• Milwaukee dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good beer, doesn’t mind a little bit of snow, and can navigate the city without a map, and also has a really good data plan for when we are trying to find parking near the lakefront, and a portable charger, and a really good knowledge of all the best places to get a cheese curd, and they can pronounce “Paczki” correctly.
• You know you’re a Milwaukeean when the question isn’t “What’s for dinner?” but “Which brewery are we hitting up tonight, and do they have a patio, and do they validate parking for bikes, and do they have a portable charger, and do they have a good data plan?”
• Why did the bratwurst cross the road in Milwaukee? To get to the other side… of the stadium where the beer was colder, and also, where there was a place to lock their bike.
• My Milwaukee GPS now just says, “Prepare for a detour due to road construction, and a strong urge for a bratwurst, and also, you might want to check if you have a parking ticket from last night, and also, you should probably have a portable charger.”
• “A Milwaukee minute” is roughly equivalent to the time it takes to finish a brat and find a parking spot near the lakefront, and then you realize you forgot your hat.
• “Milwaukee weather forecast: Expect a chance of sunshine, followed by a 90% chance of someone complaining it’s too hot or too cold, and then they are going to try to find parking near a brewery, and then they are going to try to figure out how to get their bike back home, and then they are going to realize they forgot their portable charger.”

Milwaukee Food Sayings: A Taste of the City’s Expressions

Milwaukee isn’t just about beer; it’s got a flavorful language too! “Milwaukee Food Sayings: A Taste of the City’s Expressions” explores the unique food-related lingo that locals use. From “bubbler” to “brats,” these sayings add a delicious layer to the city’s humor and charm, making conversations as tasty as the…

• My idea of a balanced Milwaukee diet is a brat in one hand, a beer in the other, and a cheese curd falling out of my mouth.
• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when the question isn’t “What’s for dinner?” but “Which fish fry are we hitting up tonight, and do they have a polka band?”
• “Just a little bit hungry” in Milwaukee means “I could probably eat a whole plate of cheese curds and a couple of brats.”
• Milwaukee: where the only thing more sacred than the Brewers is a Friday fish fry with all the fixings, and a really good data plan for when you are trying to find parking.
• “I’m not saying the portions are big, but my plate of pierogi came with its own sidecar, and a gravy boat that was bigger than my head, and then I tried to find parking.”
• My favorite Milwaukee workout? Trying to resist the urge to order another pretzel with beer cheese.
• Milwaukee weather forecast: Expect sunshine, a sudden craving for a bratwurst, and a strong chance of needing both a t-shirt and a winter coat, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike, and a portable charger.
• “I’m not saying the beer is strong, but it made me spontaneously start speaking German, and then I tried to find parking for my bike, and then I realized I forgot my hat.”
• Milwaukee dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates a good beer, doesn’t mind a little bit of snow, and can navigate the city without a map, and also has a really good data plan for when we are trying to find parking near the lakefront, and a portable charger, and also knows how to pronounce “Paczki”, and knows the best place to get a fish fry.
• You know you’re a true Milwaukeean when you can identify the exact type of cheese curd just by the squeak.
• “Just one more” in Milwaukee isn’t a quantity, it’s a unit of time, usually measured in beers and cheese curds.
• Milwaukee is so good at beer, even the water is trying to ferment.
• The only thing more intense than a Milwaukee Brewers game is the debate over which brewery is the best.
• They say the way to a Milwaukeean’s heart is through their stomach, specifically with a plate of fried cheese curds and a cold beer, and then you have to try to find a parking spot.
• Milwaukee: Where “craft beer” is not a trend, it’s a way of life, and also, it’s a good excuse to eat more cheese curds and brats, and then try to find parking.

Milwaukee Sayings About Winter: Surviving the Cold with Wit

Milwaukeeans don’t just endure winter, they joke their way through it! Our sayings are a mix of gallows humor and practical advice, like “Don’t like the weather? Wait five minutes.” We’ve got a whole lexicon of phrases that perfectly capture the frigid realities, proving that even in the deepest freeze,…

• Milwaukee winter: where the windchill is a personality trait and the lake effect is a lifestyle choice.
• You know it’s a Milwaukee winter when you start considering a balaclava a fashion accessory.
• Milwaukee winter: where the roads are paved with potholes and good intentions, and also, ice.
• My Milwaukee winter workout? Shoveling snow, and then trying to find a parking spot, and then trying to figure out if the brewery is open.
• Milwaukee winter: where the sun is a rumor, and the beer is a necessity.
• Milwaukee winter: where the only thing colder than the weather is the way my car starts on a Monday morning, and also, I forgot my portable charger.
• Milwaukee winter: where the phrase “a light dusting” means you’ll be spending the next three hours digging out your car, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your bike.
• You know you’re a Milwaukeean when you can tell the temperature by the number of layers you’re wearing, and you can still find a brewery.
• Milwaukee winter is like a long hug from a grumpy uncle: cold, a little uncomfortable, but you know he means well, and also, you should probably have a portable charger.
• Milwaukee winter: where your car is basically an ice sculpture and you are just waiting for it to melt, and also, you are trying to figure out how to get your bike home, and also, you are trying to find a place to charge your phone.
• Milwaukee weather forecast: Expect a chance of sunshine, followed by a 90% chance of someone complaining it’s too cold, and then they are going to try to find a place to park, and then they are going to realize they forgot their hat.
• Milwaukee winter is just a long excuse to drink more beer, and eat more cheese curds, and complain about the lack of parking, and also, you should probably have a really good data plan for when you are trying to figure out how to get back home.
• Milwaukee winter: where the only thing more abundant than snow is the number of opinions on which brewery has the best winter warmer, and which has the best parking for bikes, and also, you should probably have a backup plan for your car.
• Milwaukee winter: where the definition of “a quick trip” is a drive to three different breweries, and then a stop for cheese curds, and then a desperate search for a parking spot that isn’t going to get you a ticket, and then you realize you forgot your hat.
• My Milwaukee winter survival kit: a good pair of boots, a reliable snow shovel, a portable charger, a really good data plan, a map of all the breweries in the area, and a deep, abiding love for cheese curds, and a backup plan for your bike.